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GUY’S NIGHT OUT

When it comes to going out with the guys there are some few rules that you should always follow especially if you have a GF.

Guy’s Night Out has a few rules:


The ultimate rule:

Don’t Bring Your Girlfriend

This rule is self-explanatory. It’s a night out with the guys. Your friends want to see you and spend time with you.

Cardi and offset


1) Don’t tell your girl where we’re going, but find out where she’ll be

The is a sacred rule. Don’t tell you wifey where you will be going. She shouldn’t know because if she does know where you are going guess who you will run into at the club?

If she doesn’t come to the club she may send a spy to watch your little ass misbehave in the club.

2) Don’t tell your girl where we’re at – If your girl sends you a text message

If you are on your guy’s night out and you get a text like “beb uko wapi?”

Just delete the text and pretend like you never got it. It’s that simple.

Guy's night out

3) Don’t tell your girl where we went, and if she forces you to, lie your ass off

Rule number one to lying. If you lie about something never confess about it. Lie about it till you die.

If you went out and met some bitches that you know she doesn’t like it’s better if you lie and say you were at a boring place watching football.

When your girl asks you about something, don’t look like you’ve just seen a ghost or ask a dumb question like, “Mbona unaniuliza nilikua wapi,” just start laughing, it’s the best way to cover up your development of the best lie ever.)

4) You are allowed to occasionally bag a shorty or two, even though you have a girl, you just can never call or follow up

A man should be able to know he’s still got game. If you get successful and chipo a woman never follow up or call her later on.

5) You better have a damn good reason for missing Guy’s Night Out.

You should have a really convincing reason for missing dude’s night out. If you missed because you were studying for you CATS that is acceptable.

GENERAL RULES.

1. Don’t Be Cheap – Be generous and festive. Don’t complain about the bill.

2. Leave No Man Behind – Everyone gets home safe.

3. Have a Good Time – Some day you will look back at your nights out with the guys and cherish the memories.

4. Don’t Invite Random People – Especially awkward people

5. Don’t be a buzzkill – When you’re out for a good time, you should bring along a fun and easy-going attitude


I’ll leave you with this story I saw the other day.

Proof that men have better friends:

A woman didn’t come home last night; the next morning she told her husband she slept at her friend’s house. Her husband calls her 10 best friends and none of them know anything about it.

A man didn’t come home last night the next morning he says he slept over at a friend’s house. His wife calls 10 of his best friends.. 8 confirm that he slept over & 2 said he was still there!!


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Being A side nigga

Everyone knows what an illegitimate child is. The one that never gets claimed when people are around. You go to the family’s home and there are pictures around the house of everyone but that one kid.

Being the side nigga is almost the exact same thing as this except you aren’t messing with your family. A lot of you know guys or have even been the side nigga to a girl.

“Unadate huyo dem? “

“zii ako na boy” This is the most common side nigga statement

Personally I’ve been a side nigga to a certain girl. Was it bad being a side nigga? Hell No. My work was quite simple, i didn’t have to deal with her 24/7. In any relationship involving a man and a woman there are always some advantages and disadvantages.


Advantages

1) You Don’t Deal With Bullshit

If you the main nigga you had to work your way into the pussy. You had to take her out on dates, talking about her prior relationships and guy problems, and being that shoulder to lean on. This shit is aggravating as hell at times and causes a lot of unneeded stress.

But if you want the pussy it’s just something you got to deal with. Being the side nigga alleviates all these issues because she doesn’t expect you to do any of this. All you gotta do is present the dick when her main is away and do things in the bed that he doesn’t.

2) You Are Her little secret

You never have to worry about being caught fucking around with another girl cause she’s worrying about the same shit with her man. She’s sweating every time she gets an unexpected call thinking her boyfriend coming to see her earlier than expected.

On the other hand you’re trying to go 3 rounds and show her that new position you just learned on pornhub. You can do whatever you want and she can’t say anything so you are free to mess with other girls and avoid her calls or text if you got other booty cheeks lined up.

3) Unlimited supply of p$$$y

If you are a real nigga you will take full advantage of this and turn being the side nigga into a blessing. If you are a side nigga to many women then you will have an unlimited supply of coochie.

You will never have to worry about having dry dick syndrome again (Symptoms include cobwebs and dust flying out ya boxers every time you pull your pants down to take a piss). If your stroke game is on point you could have Mary on Monday, Tiffany on Tuesday Wendy on Wednesday Tasha on Thursday, Caro on Friday and Sarah on Saturday.

Obviously you should take Sunday off to recuperate because that’s the Sabbath and the Lord said “And on the 7th day I rested.”

Disadvantages

1) You Can’t Claim Who You’re Fucking

You ever been chilling with your homeboys and y’all are talking about chicks. Everybody is telling a story of some chick they had sex with, but when it’s your turn you tell the story you try to leave out names. You know what happens next. “bro acha kudanganya, ni dem mgani huyo hutaki kumtaja? ”.

You just sit there while those dummy’s clown you. When in actuality you smacking backs with the baddest chick in the hood. You just have to keep your secret. Its tough and it sucks. But if you wanna keep your pussy around y’all have to keep it lowkey. And your dumbass friends aren’t the ones you should tell if you are trying to keep a secret.

2) You Can’t Count On Her For Anything

Some nights your mad lonely and you need some pussy. You call her up but she dodging your call because she’s with her real man. Now you gotta stay at home and beat off smh. She can never fit into your schedule because she’s always with her loser ass boyfriend, so you always have to fit her schedule. When she wants you, you just sacrifice your time and meet her.

3) Her Crazy Ass Boyfriend

Her psycho ass boyfriend finally figures out about y’all and when you see him that dude foaming at the mouth. You just fucked up and you know it. Next thing you know he got you in a figure four leg lock and the only way he letting go is if you magically un-fuck his bitch! Now you got your ass beat and she gonna stop hitting you up. You took that L.

4) She’s Not Yours

You log onto Instagram and you see pictures of her at the park with her real boyfriend and that shit makes you mad. You want to be with her. Felling that love, getting those likes on Instagram. Truth is you’re starting to fall for her. And while she may like you. She loves nigga #1.

Your friends say “well at least your fucking” but in your mind, and reality, you just took an L. Sometimes you want to be the one she’s tweeting about, or the one taking her out to dinner, surprising her with dates. But that isn’t your place.

In most cases you two don’t even go out in public. And when you do you’re introduced as the “friend” side nigga isn’t all good. Especially when you start to catch feelings and you wake up and realize you’re just a flame.

Being the side nigga has its up and downs, just like every social position between a man and a woman. And chances are as an average male you’re going to experience this at least once in your life. Over all it’s a dope eye opening experience. We hope this knowledge we dropped on you can help you be prepared for your next 007 adventure with a cheating ass bitch.


Remember to read, laugh, and share with friends. As always it’s your homies

Confessions of a fuckgirl

It’s no secret we all love confessions, here is one by a friend who wants to remain anonymous. Names have been change.


I don’t do relationships. I haven’t been monogamous with another human being since early 2015 and I’m in absolutely no rush to change that.

I can’t remember the last time i made a commitment on anything. I size most people up by my level of attractiveness to them and the likelihood of my ability to sleep with them. I have tried (and succeeded) at getting more than one (or two…or three…or six) of my close friends into bed and it never went further than that .

I realized over the strike period that my go-to tactic for hitting on people, specifically with men, is to “neg” them. If you haven’t heard of negging, it’s essentially when you give backhanded compliments or lightly insult people in order to make them desperate for your attention.

Worst part about negging? It fucking works. I once successfully chipod a guy by calling him Dora the Explorer all night because of his backpack he was openly wearing. And he tried to date me. Not just fuck me. DATE me. I only allowed him to explore my body.

I own my sexuality and my body. I don’t think I’m ugly — not even a little. I also drink like a fish (alcohol and wine are my two favorite hobbies), i make zero apologies about trying out trends (I’m currently wearing a suspender skirt and Birkenstocks), and generally just do whatever I want if it feels good and I WANT to do it. And you know what? I’m not sorry.

I’m not sorry even a little bit.
The only thing I am hesitant about, with the intent of being truly transparent, is the residual societal guilt placed upon being a woman who owns her sexuality and her preferences. Yes i fuck around but I’ve never been pregnant, no STDS, I don’t use P2. The only thing i rely on is sex with a CD. I love myself too much to risk doing anything without protection. I never miss a packet of CD in my purse. NO GLOVE NO LOVE 🍆💦

I’m not SUPPOSED to admit that I like to hit it and quit it. I’m not supposed to send a “uko hom nikam kukuona?” text even though I don’t really give a shit about Brayo; I just want him to go down on me. I’m not supposed to enjoy being on my own. I’m supposed to want to commit, supposed to ask, “What are we?”, and supposed to look for the hidden meanings between the lines of drunken promises given at 3 AM after we’re done climbing each other like trees.

But I don’t. I really, really don’t.
I guess there’s one other thing I’m
slightly hesitant about, since we’re being honest. And that’s the idea that fuckboys, and subsequently fuckgirls, can’t also be good people.

Seriously though! Whether he’s the guy who fucks like a goddamn beast and looks like a tool, or she’s the girl unapologetically asking you to leave because she has an early morning class, or whether those images are reversed. The fact that they aren’t the picture perfect human that you idealized them to be doesn’t mean that they’re just 1000% a dick.

They may have dick-ish tendencies, sure. I’ll give you that. But they still call their mothers when they miss them, still probably get emotional at the videos of dogs greeting their soldier owners when those owners come home, and send sweet messages to their loved ones just. like. you.

The point is, or the point I’m trying to get at rather, is that I guess…maybe I am a fuckboy. Or a fuckgirl.

I sleep with random people in favor of being in a relationship. I send flirty texts to try and get reactions from people. I openly make fun of guys to try and make them desperate for my attention. I think I’m pretty hot most days. I also think I’m pretty hysterical and sarcastic. My memes game is lit. I own white Vans and Doc Martens and am trying to figure out how to make the vintage snapback I bought to work with my current hairstyle.

Doc martens

My current IG profile has a serious lack of smiling, and my bio absolutely says, I’m never going to follow you on Instagram

My name is Sandra, and I’m pretty sure I’m a fuckgirl.

I’m pretty sure I’m a fuckgirl, but I also have a pretty fucking sick life.
And if you feel the need to judge me for it, or label me a bad person because of said life, then that makes you more of an asshole than I will ever be.


This is just part 1. In part two i will be thanking all the fuckboys who made me what i am today.

Yours freaky

Sandra


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The hoe phase

Hoe-Phase
a phase in your life that occurs frequently when you are fine with exploring promiscuous activities and connecting with random people. these activities do not always end in s-x, but can lead to it.

Welcome back, welcome back, welcomeee back.

If you’re new to this blog then you’re in for a ride, but if you’re an avid reader of this blog, then you already know what the fuck is going on.

During the hoe phase, Your pussy is in it’s prime. It’s shining bright like a diamond, and it’s not entitled to anyone. It’s yours and you’re having your way.
Stop acting like y’all don’t know what I’m talking about.

Here are some reasons why the hoe phase is important and what you get from it.

1.You learn a lot about yourself and your preferences

A hoe phase teaches you a lot. You learn what works best for you, what doesn’t, and what you want in a partner. The whole point is to use this time to experiment and come to better understand yourself, and trust me, you’ll do just that.

2. You’ll know enough f*ckboys to last you two lifetimes

3. You get really good at reading boys

The ONLY good thing about constantly dealing with these guys is that you get really good at reading them. They’re all cut from the same cloth; never think otherwise. Your ability to notice f*ckboytendencies will skyrocket after just a few months of being in your hoe phase

4. Guys will test you on every single level.

Your patience will grow thinner with each boy, and eventually, you’ll learn the invaluable skill of calling people on out their f*ckery before it’s too late. Don’t take sh*t from anyone, honey.

5. The stories are priceless

You and your gfs will have enough priceless stories to talk about for ages.

The HOE PHASE is VITAL.

I don’t literally mean go and fuck every nigga with a heartbeat and hard dick. I just mean TREAT YO SELF.

The Hoe Phase is imperative in finding out what you like sexually, but most importantly what you like ROMANTICALLY. Every guy WILL not stimulate your mind like they stimulate your vagina. It’s about figuring out what you do like, what you don’t like, and what you might like.

Do you like big dicks or little ones? Do you like emotional men, or non-emotional men?
Do you like your pussy ate?
Do you like your boobs sucked or clit rubbed?

YOU KNOW SHIT LIKE THAT. It’s about figuring shit out.
So does that really make you a hoe if you just figuring shit out?

EVERY SINGLE FEMALE HAS HAD A HOE PHASE/WILL HAVE A HOE PHASE

But Hoe-ism doesn’t come naturally or to everyone. Some skip the hoe phase. something triggers that inner hoe inside of you.

Stepping into The Hoe Phase is all due to a chain reaction or TRIGGERS.
What happened to you? Why are you this HOE all of sudden?
You have different dick appointments back to back. Unread messages left to right.

It’s not fun anymore. You got tired and your pussy is sore. You don’t even like any of these guys anymore , so what are you really doing? You’re acting out and it’s not completely your fault.

There are 3 different triggers of THE Hoe Phase:

1. Breakups

2. Lack of Experience

3. Insecurities

THE Hoe Phase

Let’s REITERATE before we get started. This blog is using the word
HOE very very loosely.
Don’t equate HOE= SUCKING AND FUCKING.

Let’s get started shall we,

PRODUCTS OF THE HOE PHASE

1. The Breakup Hoe:

The Breakup Hoe: these the type of hoes that just got out of a relationship and ready to let loose.
The heartbroken hoe: Nigga already broke up with her and she’s feeling more vulnerable than ever.

Hurt hoe: She’s trying to make herself feel better, feel wanted by indulging in doses of dick. But the hoe has never dealt with the hurt from her previous bf, so she’ll be in a cycle of doing dick after dick after dick after dick. Until she realizes why she’s dealing with all of these different type of man, she’ll forever be a hurt hoe.

So Ladies, when leaving a relationship, please take some time to yourself.

Deal with that hurt first, assess why the relationship didn’t work out.
Note how you can handle past problems with your ex differently with a future partner. I mean do you really want to carry all of that baggage into your next relationships?

So PACK LIGHT,
That NEW DICK won’t heal the hurt from that old one.

2.The Inexperienced Hoe:

The Inexperienced Hoe, these the type of hoes that’s not used to getting dick. She either was ugly and glo’ed up or was sheltered by strict parents , went away to college and started getting fucked. A lot of these hoes were raised in the church.

The little innocent hoe: The hoe that gets fucked on the low. Who she think she fooling? This the type of hoe that’s involved in every thing possible. SHE’S PRODUCTIVE PERSON.

We all know a girl of this type.
She didn’t know dick felt so good, didn’t know that dick would turn her into a little crazy freak. She stepped into her Hoe Phase as an innocent girl and Left as a freaky girl. This type of hoe can be saved, she just NEEDED that experience for her well being.

3. The Insecure Hoe:

The Insecure Hoe, these the type of hoes that suffer from low self-esteem, so she fills her voids up with multiple dicks. Multiple.

This is the type of hoe that every guy has had, because they in fact know she’s a HOE. This type of hoe has absolutely no care for herself, she got no chills, she will fuck your squad and not feel a damn thing.

The hoe of the campus. Everyone has had this hoe. But it’s something wrong with the lil bitch, she hatessss herself. But guys don’t care, if she’s ready to suck, they ready to fuck.

She wants to feel pretty, she wants to feel smart, she wants to feel wanted.
This type of Hoe CAN NOT be saved.
She only can save herself. Leave her to die honestly, An insecure hoe has deeper issues, deep seeded issues that requires professional help.

Then we have the broke hoes, fat hoes, rich hoes, dumb hoes, tall hoes, hood hoes, suburban hoes, lame hoes.
Different hoes for different reasons.
Hoes gone indeed be hoes.
But honestly, HOE PHASES are needed!

Please date more than one person at a time.

DATE NOT FUCK! If you don’t know how to date multiple people here is a blog about it http://menez.co.ke/date-multiple-men/

It’s not about “being a hoe”.
It’s about expanding your horizons, you never know what you like until you actually try it.

Too many times, women invest THEIR ALL into a fuckboy, when really they don’t know any better, because they haven’t experienced any better.
Or waste precious years in a relationship that’s not stimulating them.

Women who have went through the HOE PHASE end up in relationships.
Plot Twist right?

It’s because she knows how she wants to be treated, and knows how she wants to be fucked. Check around your campus those who you called hoes are now in good happy relationship.

A woman who knows what she wants is a dangerous woman.

And how can you know what you want if you’ve never had those life experiences?

Hoe Phases are for self- awareness, they shed light on what you will and won’t accept.

Experiencing different men is IMPORTANT. Experience but Don’t fuck all men claiming to be ‘experiencing’

And remember.

Always play your cards right,
Realize why you are in your hoe phase, are there deeper issues?
It’s not about being a hoe, IT’S ABOUT EXPERIENCING HOE-ISM.


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It’s okay to be a virgin

Just So You Know, It’s Okay To Still Be A Virgin In Your 20s

Hi guys, I’m Kendra guest posting on this website. I hope you will love my blog.


So, I’m 23 and I still haven’t had sex.

In today’s day and age, if anyone besides my close friends were to hear this, I am sure they would look at me strangely or with a sudden air of surprise, because losing your virginity today is something that usually happens when you are, let’s say, 16, or now, it’s starting even earlier for some.

I do, however, acknowledge that I am a late-bloomer and I have had some experiences later in life and I think when I was a lot younger, let’s say, 18, 19, I would get teased by people and actually feel insecure about this.

It would be family members who would make jokes or friends and co-workers who would comment and giggle a little, ending our the conversations with a slight, “Awww, that’s so precious.”

And at the time, it would bother me. I would then begin to feel insecure and wonder if there was something wrong with me for still being a virgin.

I mean, I was embarrassed, but I just had never met anyone in my life yet and I viewed sex as something I wanted to share with someone I really loved. Call me old school, but everyone’s views on love and sex are different and this is just how I saw everything at the time.

But slowly, I started to feel the pressure. Friends I knew that waited for either religious or their own reasons were now having sex and hoeing around and I wondered if I was the only one not doing it.

However, now that I am in a relationship, sex is something I still want to take my time with because as someone who is highly emotional, sensitive, and a deep and introspective thinker, I need to be in a place mentally where I think I am ready for sex and right now, I’m not. And guess what, it’s okay.

There are so many people, whether it be in their 20s, or even their 30s, who have sex just because they want to fill a void, but they aren’t truly happy or emotionally invested in a relationship, as well as even mentally equipped to handle the heaviness that comes with sex.

Like it’s not just a thing that people do, even though that is what the media perpetuates and feeds us.

Yes, Netflix and chill does exist, but a lot of people are actually out here having sex with people they don’t love and just doing it because. A lot of young girls as well, know they are not ready, but do it anyway because society tells us that we have to by this age and if you don’t you are abnormal. For those of you still virgins, your relationships won’t always be easy. You will lose boyfriends just because you decided not to have sex.

Thinking back now to who I was when I was younger, I know for a fact I would not have been emotionally ready as of yet for sex and any of the mental consequences that comes with it. And at the time, I wasn’t even with the gem of a boyfriend I have now, who actually encourages me to wait until I am ready.

My point is this, there are various reasons why people are virgins, whether for religious reasons or by choice and it shouldn’t matter what age you lose your virginity and there is definitely no shame in when you lose it as well.

Being a virgin does not define you and if you are someone who hasn’t had sex yet for any reason, whether you are religious, not ready, or whatever it may be, I just want you to know you are okay just being you and you aren’t abnormal for not yet being sexually active. Don’t be pressured.

Guard your mind and heart emotionally for when you are ready and you will thank yourself later.

And the way I see it, you have all your life to have sex, so it is honestly just waiting for you to enjoy🍆💦

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Btw from next week Friday i will be writing for a new magazine. Here is a link to their website teennetworkmagazine.com

17 Questions Every Girl Has About Sex At One Point or Another

Hey guys, it’s Tiana. I’m back with some bits of wisdom. Here we go….


17 Questions Every Girl Has About Sex At One Point or Another

It doesn’t matter if you’re a virgin or more experienced in the sheets—everyone has questions about doing the deed. While you’ll never be able to reenact the kind of steamy hookup scenes you see on Gossip Girl or Riverdale, you’ve probably had a few of these thoughts, and more, about getting down and dirty.

1. What’s with the positions having such weird names?

Reverse Cowgirl should be a restaurant that sells healthy delicious food, not something you do to another human. Scissors should just remain an item not a position you and your partner indulge in.

2. How do people manage to fuck while standing up?

You’d rather be naughty in bed…where you can conveniently fall asleep right after.

3. Is shower sex really as hot as people make it look on TV?

You can barely shower alone without slipping. Shower sex is quite overrated. The movies make it seem amazing but in real life it ain’t.

4. Is it normal to not want him to stop?

Pleaseee don’t finish, this is too amazing to stop right now. Keep hitting those sweet spots.

5. Is it normal to feel like his 🍆 is penetrating up to my stomach?

Most girls can relate to this. I mean, that ka feeling where he’s so deep into you that you aren’t sure if he’s still in your nunu.

6. How do you muster up the energy and willpower to 69?

I’m sure you all know these position. If not just google. The only way you can multi-task is by eating, chatting and watching Big Brother Africa simultaneously.

7. Why is anal even a thing?

Who decided that it’d be a fun idea to enter the back door that releases all the crap you eat on a daily basis? Stick to the regular hole.

8. What are you supposed to do during oral?

Giggle? Squirm? Spread your legs like a starfish? Look at him? It’s super confusing.

9. Who decided it was sexy to bite and twist nipples?

I have nothing against BDSM, but that is 50 shades of way too painful. Handle my nipples with care.

10. If the bed doesn’t squeak, does that mean you aren’t thrusting hard enough?

You’re not in good enough shape for this! I hear some break beds. Wow just wow.

11. Should you alternate between kissing and fucking, or do it at the same time like in the movies?

This will get super sweaty instead of super sexy, real fast.

Last time you screamed so loud, your roommates thought you were being murdered. If you moan too loud he may think you are faking, if you don’t moan he may think you aren’t feeling a thing.

13. How are you supposed to easily transition into new positions?

If you change positions too fast, you might end up farting or something. If you haven’t pussy farted then you have no idea what I’m talking about. And if you change positions to fast you might ruin his stroke game.

14. Are you supposed to clean yourself afterwards?

You have boxes of tissues reserved to crying, and…well, you know.

15. Is it normal to fantasize about sex during the most random, inappropriate times?

You in class absent minded, and all you are doing is thinking about the pussy pounding you got last weekend and fantasizing about how it will be next time.

16. How do you manage a threesome?

You can’t even be bothered to share your food with people, much less your SO and SO with someone else.

17. Do guys moan?


Those are my questions that I’ve had about sex.

Don’t forget to

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Keep it classy, never trashy, just a little bit of nasty.

Why intelligent girls are the hardest to date

Intelligent girls listen to logic over their gut. They will not enter a relationship based on attraction alone. They need a stronger connection than that. A spiritual one. An emotional one.

They keep their hearts guarded because most boys are undeserving of their love. They are not going to hand themselves over to someone who takes them for granted. Someone who sees them as just pussy. Someone who expects to receive more than he is willing to give.

Intelligent girls are skeptics. Cynics. They are wise enough to know that most people are selfish. Most people will hurt them without thinking twice about it.

That’s why these girls keep both eyes open. They watch for red flags. If they catch someone in a lie, they will not want anything to do with that person. They don’t let their emotions cloud their decisions. If their brain is telling them they are better off without a certain someone, then they will not hesitate to walk away.

Intelligent girls refuse to take part in drama. They do not want to fight for your attention. They do not want to decipher mixed signals. They do not want to search for holes in your stories. They do not want to be bothered with petty games.

If you play hard to get by ignoring their texts and then liking their photos or viewing their status, they will leave. If you expect them to chase after you, you will end up disappointed.

They are not interested in one-sided relationships. They are not willing to settle for less than they have earned. They know how valuable they are and they aren’t going to let anyone convince them otherwise.

Intelligent girls are aware that relationships aren’t everything is more than an old cliche. It’s the truth. They are independent. Self-sufficient. They can find happiness on their own. They are strong enough to hold themselves up without a boy to help them balance.

Of course, that doesn’t mean that intelligent girls close their hearts off completely. They are willing to take a chance on a relationship, as long as the other person seems worth the energy.

Intelligent girls do not want to waste their time. They do not want to get involved with someone who will break their heart someday down the line. They are careful about who they allow into their world in order to protect themselves.

Intelligent girls won’t let themselves get attached easily, but once they fall in love, there is no turning back. They will treat you with respect, they will teach you new things, they will help you grow to your fullest potential.

Intelligent girls make the best girlfriends because once they know you can be trusted, they are not going to give up on you. They are going to encourage you and inspire you. They are going to be your best friend and your biggest motivator.

Intelligent girls keep their hearts guarded for most of their life, but once they let those hearts out of their cages, they will love you unconditionally.


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keep it classy.

Dear 20 year olds

Dear 20-year olds

On the 31st of March 2018, a six-foot-five, heavily-tattooed man stood on the sidelines of a soccer game in Los Angeles. It was the 71st minute and his team was down 3-1. He had had an illustrious career in Europe but was now already 36-years-old. Some had written him off as washed up.

Only one year ago, he had been stretchered off a game with a terrible knee injury. His English team had released him from his contract while he continued to recuperate. Now, he stared into the warm California afternoon, about to make his debut for yet another new team: the LA Galaxy.

20 minutes later, he had already scored an amazing goal to make it 3-3. But he wasn’t done. In the dying minutes of the game, another ex-English Premier League player floated a dangerous ball right in front of opponent LAFC’s goal.

Zlatan Ibrahimovich jumped highest and reached the ball just before the LAFC goalkeeper’s outstretched hands. The ball looped into the corner of the goal. 4-3 and game over. Zlatan had won the game and written his name into the history books.

It was a perfect debut.


Millennials like myself want it all now, the money, designer clothes, the job that pays for full time travel and the perfect relationship.

Our elders say it’s a pipe dream but we have the proof on social media, people really have these lifestyles and they’ve become our inspiration.

We see the peak of the mountain from the base but we don’t want to climb it, we want a helicopter straight to the top.

The brutal truth is that life rarely works that way, people at the top usually worked hard to get there.

The social media highlight reel shows ‘perfection’, what it doesn’t show is the blood sweat and tears behind the scenes that people endured to get there.

We are under so much pressure. For those who love hiphop I’m sure you can name like 20 dudes who made it in life before the age of 25. If you can’t, let me help you out. This is a list of young rich today rappers who got most of their success last year.

Xxxtentacion

Xxxtentacion

  • Lil tay – she’s 9years old
  • Bhad bhabie – she’s 15years old
  • Desiigner – 20years old
  • Post Malone – 23years old
  • Lil yachty – 20years old
  • Takeshi 69 – 22years old
  • Lil pump – 17years old
  • Lil uzi – 23years old
  • Nasty C – 19years old
  • trippie Redd – 19years old
  • Rich the kid – 19years old
  • Wifisfuneral – 19years old
  • Xxxtentacion – 19years
  • YBN jay Almighty – 19years

The list is endless. At one point in Justin Bieber’s career he retired at the age of 18. Avicii retired at the age of 26. He had made so much money that could sustain him for 100 years without working even a single day.

Everybody wants to be successful. But in today’s day and age, success alone isn’t enough. Most of us want to be wildly successful when we’re young. We dream of the perfect debut.

Wouldn’t it be nice? To be on top of the world before you hit 30?To have enough money to buy whatever you want, the ability to travel anywhere in the world, and all the fame that comes with it?

But the truth is, you’re likely gonna fail when you’re young. More often than you’d like to imagine. And that’s okay.

Here’s why.

You Won’t Match Up to Your Inspiration

The great American radio personality Ira Glass once said:

“For the first couple years you make stuff, it’s just not that good… But your taste, the thing that got you into the game, is still killer. And your taste is why your work disappoints you.” Our taste keeps on changing. Something we did a year ago doesn’t look that good as compared to what we are currently doing.

He was talking about creative work here, but it could apply to just about any young person’s work. Most of us do things because we’re inspired by greatness. We admire the Taylor Swifts, Cristiano Ronaldos, drakes, and Mark Zuckerbergs of the world.

We’re spoiled with so much quality that we don’t even realize it. Thanks to the Internet and Spotify, any high school student can instantly listen to a “greatest hits” collection and decide they wanna be the next Selena Gomez.

But unless you’ve been hustling hard like Selena since you were seven-years-old, you’re probably gonna suck when you start. And you’re gonna be sad if you keep comparing yourself to the best in the world.

Just understand that it’s natural. You’re never gonna match up to your idols in the beginning, but don’t stop being inspired.

You Learn More Through Struggle

20 years ago, the original tech-genius-billionaire wrote:

“Success is a lousy teacher. It seduces smart people into thinking they can’t lose.” – Bill Gates

Just consider the lowest common denominator for success that most people use: money. And the weirdly-frequent cases of big-money lottery winners who go broke. If you won the type of money that would allow you to not work another day in your life, would you blow it all away?

Yet, we have heartbreaking stories of people who ended up way worse than before their lucky money (sportpesa jackpot winners). It’d be easy to blame this on stupidity, recklessness, or bad luck. But I’m not so sure.

Instead, I think the people who lost it all were unprepared for handling large sums of money. What’s worse, they didn’t get qualified people to help them, and they didn’t learn in time. You can make money through luck. But it takes skill to keep it.

Of course, success means a whole lot more than money. But the same principle applies: if we never develop skills for success in the first place, we’re bound to lose it.

So don’t be upset if you’re constantly falling down when you’re starting out. You’re not a failure. You’re learning how to be a success.

Success Takes Time

Today, we live in a culture of hacks. We’re bombarded by good-looking salesmen promising us 10 times the success in half the time (work at home pyramid schemes) . It’s a seductive message: “You can make 10k every week if you let us train you on how to makes loads of cash using your smartphone .”

But the laws of nature tell us otherwise. Real value takes time to build. There’s a reason why we value 25-year-old whiskeys more than cheap spirits.

This isn’t a rant against change; I understand that old ways aren’t always the best. Yes, we need to get better and faster.

But when we’re young, we often don’t have the wisdom to differentiate between valueless hacks and quality improvements. So we try and try, swinging between failure and success. Thankfully, history has stories to encourage us.


Vera Wang‘s figure skating career didn’t work out, so she worked a day job for 19 years, learning all she could about fashion. She launched her first boutique at the grand young age of 40. Now she’s a famous designer know all over.

Jack Ma was 35-years-old and a multiple reject of Harvard Business School, the China police force, and even KFC, then he started Alibaba. It took him 15 years before he became a billionaire at 50.

J.K. Rowling spent her late twenties living on welfare as a single mother. She felt like a failure, was diagnosed with depression, and even considered suicide. It took seven long years from when she was first inspired to write about a boy wizard to when her “perfect debut” was published: Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone.

Believe it or not there was a time Samuel L Jackson wasn’t famous. He became famous while in his early 40’s. Thanks to Quentin Tarantino who saw something special in him.


When we’re young, we believe we can conquer the world easily. But life has a funny way of teaching us a lesson when we step into the arena.

Bloodied and bruised, we take a step back and question ourselves. “Why is it so hard?” “Is it really worth it?” “Will I ever succeed?”

But just like how adulting confusingly lies somewhere in between the blind optimism of youth and the bitterness of a cynical old-timer, there are no black-and-white answers. At best, we could say “it depends.”

What does it depend on?

Opportunities. Timing. Privilege. Motivation. We could go on and on…

But most of all, it depends on you.

“Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.”

As long as you are breathing you can still make it


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